A woman’s parents, who live far away from her, decided to visit her for Christmas. They drove for over ten hours to meet their daughter, but upon their arrival, the woman refused to let them into her house. The pressing question is, why?
The holiday season is a perfect time for people to reunite with their loved ones and cherish the bonds that bind them together. Christmas provides an excellent opportunity to celebrate love and togetherness and to be grateful for all their blessings.
Families and friends who don’t have much time to see each other during the year often manage to come together for the festive season. However, imagine the heartbreak of those who somehow cannot revel in this simple yet heartwarming joy. Today’s story sheds light on something similar.
In December 2021, an anonymous female contributor turned to Reddit’s “Raised by Narcissists” forum to pen her story. She began her narrative by sharing that she refused to let her parents into her house for Christmas, even though they drove for more than ten hours to see her. After that, she shared some background and critical details about her family.
The original poster’s mother lived on the West Coast, her dad on the East Coast, and she resided in New England. At first, her mom flew to her dad’s house, and together, they drove with the dog. It was the first time she had spent more than three days without talking to her parents. Moreover, the woman also felt a sense of longing to see her pup again.
Whenever the woman’s parents visited, their comments stung like bitter winter winds. “You got even fatter than the last time I saw you,” they’d say, or “I didn’t think you could get any uglier, but your face looks so bad,” “Let’s go get your hair and nails done because you’ll never find a husband looking like that,” and “If you don’t have kids, then who will take care of you when you’re older?”
The woman, however, wasn’t on a quest for a husband. With a flourishing career and an ongoing pursuit of a Ph.D., she had chosen a different path. But despite her achievements, her parents didn’t endorse this lifestyle. Instead, they labeled her as fat and ugly, only to later lament about her apparent low self-esteem and lack of confidence.
Her parents would rummage through her kitchen, dumping the food and insisting she only ate what they prepared. To salvage items from being thrown out, the woman had to discreetly stash them in the bedroom closet before their visits. When she expressed frustration, they dismissed her, claiming she was too sensitive or unable to take a joke.
Despite her repeated requests to change their behavior, they perceived her as moody and didn’t take it seriously. Hoping to convey the gravity of her feelings, the woman eventually refused to see them. From their perspective, they considered themselves great parents, having never inflicted physical harm on their daughter during her upbringing.
Furthermore, the woman’s parents had afforded her a quality education, granting her access to all the facilities and material possessions she could need. Despite a persistent sense of guilt lingering in her thoughts for how she had handled the situation with them, she took pride in finally standing up for herself.
After enduring 30 years of emotional abuse and her parents’ constant rudeness and disrespect, the woman finally put her foot down and stood firm in her decision. During the summer, she clearly communicated that she had no desire to spend time with them if they continued with their bad attitudes and constant insults.
Despite her warning, her parents didn’t take it seriously. After she refused to spend Christmas with them, she hoped they could recognize the seriousness of her stance. She also asked for advice from the online community after not letting her parents into her home. Redditors had the following advice: